Sicily : Hey man, I’ve been having this business idea in my mind but I don’t know where to start you know. Like I just keep thinking about all the things that could possibly go wrong. What if it fails ? What if I don’t get clients? What if in the end it’s just a waste of time and money man ?
Pinto : Imagine just start. Have a plan and a vision and set out to achieve that. This time that you are spending worrying about what could go wrong won’t change a thing. Start now, trust the process and don’t overthink it.
Does the above sound like a conversation you have had with someone before ?
I remember this one day I spent overthinking.
I was just finishing up on a certain assignment that had been handed to me when the boss came over and told me that he’d like to have a word with me once I had completed the assignment.
Never have I ever typed slower to just somehow push this having a word moment as far away as would have been possible.
I was so worried. I kept thinking and thinking on what it could be about. Had I done something wrong ?
If I did, then I had to make sure that I had done this particular assignment to perfection if only to gain some saving grace you know.
Long story short, the “word” was just him asking my opinion about some changes he was thinking of making around the office.
Can you imagine ? I had killed myself with all these thoughts only for that to be the case.
I will not even start on the “we need to talk” texts ...
What is overthinking ?
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines overthink as : “to think too much about (something) : to put too much time into thinking about or analyzing (something) in a way that is more harmful than helpful”
From the above definition we can derive that sometimes overthinking can actually be helpful. Sometimes it’s necessary to think through everything especially when making a huge decision that could potentially be life-changing.
However, if these kinds of thoughts always cripple you and the end result is not a decision with finality but rather a dive into a never ending cycle of thoughts then it becomes dangerous and a need to put mechanisms to prevent this arises.
Here are a few things you can consider if you’re struggling with overthinking. Also, bear in mind that I am not an expert on this but just someone speaking on an experiential basis.
1. Don’t think for others too - I don’t know about you but I know that it’s possible for our thoughts to wander so much that we even now start thinking for others. We start analyzing situations on their behalf and it goes on and on.
Let people think for themselves and wait for them to communicate their thoughts other than trying to figure out what’s on their mind.
This will save you a lot of your precious time and keep you sane.
2. Accord yourself the same grace and reasonableness with which you do others - it’s so easy to be so hard on ourselves.
Yet the truth of the matter is that it’s not possible to consistently anticipate anything and everything that can happen so as to be well equipped for it. The sooner we accept this, the better.
If you find it easy to perhaps tell someone “oh it’s okay” when they for instance failed to include a parameter for research in their methodology because it didn’t cross their mind, it should be easy to also tell yourself it’s okay that you didn’t think about this and that. Be okay with not having thought out everything. Normalize it.
3. Be willing to do without knowing or learning everything beforehand. It’s scary. It’s hard. But oh so necessary.
Finally, I have read this book - Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking
Book by Malcolm Gladwell and I would recommend it just for the sake of perspective to see how it can be possible for you to be easily decisive and who knows; think without thinking.
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